The Night Before

I'm sitting with Gage in his room waiting for him to fall asleep and I am thinking about tomorrow. When I scheduled this appointment for him 2 months ago, I didn't realize the date I had scheduled it for as I just took the first available appointment. I know now that Jill had to have a hand in it...tomorrow marks 3 months since she left this Earth in her body form. I say it that way because I know she is still here. Life sometimes gets so busy we miss the subtle signs and then BAM! In your face...she doesn't let me forget. So as I sit here thinking about what tomorrow's appointment for Gage might bring, I'm reminded that no matter what it will be ok. It's just a word, right.

We've had some small successes with Gage this week with eating. He unfortunately is like his mommy with his eating...very picky. His diet generally consists of pancakes, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, chicken nuggets, bananas, applesauce, and Mac and cheese. On Sunday, he asked for an egg. I thought he was kidding, but he kept asking. So I asked. Him if he wanted to eat the egg and he told me yes. So I made it crossing my fingers that he would eat it. Sure enough he ate at least half of it. I wanted to do a dance. Then today I came home and noticed an almost gone granola bar. It would seem that he asked for it as well and ate it. I'm so happy. It's the small things that everyone else takes for granted that I celebrate and cheer when I see them. Over the past several weeks, Gage has become more affectionate with us. I notice that he is interacting more often than he had in the past. This too I celebrate.

Life is short and I'm reminded not to take myself so seriously. Somewhere along the way I forgot that I need to have fun. Life and responsibilities have put up road blocks. Sometimes we all need reminders....I have Jill.

So I sit here the night before I know it is going to be ok.

Until next time...